Why Can this Wimpy Woman Steer a Wheelchair?
Why I Get Aggravated
I get so aggravated when big, burly guys try to negotiate Grandma Myrtle or Great-Uncle Oscar’s wheelchair over bumps in sidewalks and slightly raised thresholds, or onto a shallow-stepped landing. Their standard method of operation is to ram the wheelchair at the obstacle, jarring Grandma or Oscar in the process and nearly scaring them to death.
“What’s the matter with them?” I mutter under my breath. “Why don’t they turn the wheelchair around, tip it onto the back two wheels, and ease it over the bump?”
About that time I start feeling slightly superior because I know how to steer a wheelchair, and they don’t. Naa-na-na-na-na-na.
Why I Can Steer a Wheelchair
But then I remember why I can steer a wheelchair better than those big, burly men. It’s because my dad was in a wheelchair most of his adult life. He was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis when I was two and for the next 38 years, used his wheelchair to get where he needed to go. So quite early, my siblings and I learned how to maneuver a wheelchair, a skill we assumed every kid learned when growing up. No wonder I get impatient with big, burly guys who didn’t know squat about the handy, dandy contraptions.
Sometimes, well-meaning people would comment on our family when we wereout and about. “Isn’t that just so sad?” they would say, or “That must be so hard for them,” or “What a burden for that poor family.” You’ve probably heard similar comments if you’re caring for a special needs child or one who is chronically ill.
What I Learned
But people who made those comments about our family didn’t see the whole picture. They didn’t know my siblings and I were having the time of our lives, pushing Dad’s wheelchair and sneaking rides down hills with him when Mom wasn’t looking. And they didn’t realize we were learning skills other kids weren’t, useful stuff about how to have fun when life isn’t perfect, and how to persevere and show compassion, and how to steer a wheelchair better than big, burly guys.
What Are You Learning?
Many of the people who comment on your family don’t see the whole picture either. For that matter neither do you, because you will spend the rest of your lives discovering the precious lessons and skills that accompany life with a disabled or ill family member. Some lessons will be practical, some joyful, and some bittersweet, but all of them will be life-changing and precious.
Every now and then, this blog will discuss issues that accompany caring for sick kids in the home. If you have something you want addressed, leave a comment. I may not have the answers, but another reader might. After all, we’re the people who have learned to have fun when life isn’t perfect, persevere, show compassion, and steer wheelchairs better than big, burly guys.
We’ve got a lot of lessons to share. So please, leave a comment about what you’ve learned in the process of care giving.
